empathy: learned or innate?
I’m probably too empathetic to work at a prison. I get teary eyed easily when anyone shares their story with me. It’s hard not to.
I suppose one could work in healthcare and not be empathetic. Maybe some healthcare positions lend themselves to that more readily to be able to do their job. I’ve definitely got the empathy bug.
Some of my patients don’t. This may not be a surprise being that they’ve been sentenced to incarceration for crimes against others.
One of my patients outright said he doesn’t know how to feel empathy. He’s gone to classes while incarcerated to work on learning this skill. But, he just doesn’t have it. This is how he committed the crimes that he did. Carjack someone…..don’t need empathy to do that right. His medical diagnosis didn’t say, sociopath, out right, but I’d say that’s a hallmark.
This was a little disconcerting to me as I worked with him alone in the PT office on multiple occasions. If something were to happen to me, would he do anything to help? Or would he be willing to harm me because he just doesn’t care? Fortunately, he was always respectful and appreciative of my help. But I was relieved when he self-discharged himself since he was feeling better and was independent with his home exercise program.
Many of my patients, however, do report being changed by their prison experience. They note they didn’t know empathy before, but through programming classes, they’ve evolved.
One individual who identified as a Sleeper, shared that he had a great life before his criminal involvement. He had great parents, a job, and a home. But he just threw it all away. He has deep regrets but admitted he never had empathy. That’s changed and now, he tries to be of service to others in the system.
Another patient expressed a similar evolution. He never cared about anyone but himself. And it aided his life of crime. And even as a lifer, he’s learning to care for others. He mentioned each time opportunities come around for them to donate to a cause he always does. He did so for a recent Torch Run to benefit the Special Olympics.
One of my patients expresses dislike of how empathetic he’s become. He admits crying to the news reports and ads on TV. He hates it. He doesn’t know what to do with this new found emotion. He thinks it makes him less masculine and weak. I explained that he’s completely normal. That’s how it is to have empathy….you feel for the other when you see them suffering.
And that is definitely my experience. I can recall the first moment I felt empathy. I was probably age 5. I’m not certain if it’s an ability that was learned or innate. I do know that it’s made me the healthcare provider I’ve become.
And I see in my inmate patients that it is an ability that can be learned. Or perhaps it’s innate but just needs the right environment and skills to develop/enhance it.
What do you think? Is empathy learned or innate?
*just to note. Images are not from the prison as no devices are allowed in.
Prison PT 
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